Monday, December 12, 2011

Life's Irritating Mysteries

  • So, if all the stalls are taken in a public restroom, it is acceptable to go ahead and use the handicapped stall.  Why is the same concept not okay for parking?  Especially if it is literally a quick trip and you have little kids in tow.
  • And speaking of parking, I hate when motorcycles take a parking spot.  And how irritating is it when some honking, hill-billy, dully truck takes up two spaces?  Or better, how about when you think there is a space, only to find that it is occupied by some tiny little car (like a smart car or a mini cooper). 
  • Why do people run marathons?  I really don't get it.
  • Drive thru liquor store?  Why aren't there more?
  • Could windshield wipers be designed to cover more ground?
  • Why don't sleeping bags roll up nicely?  Why even bother with those tiny bags they give you.  What you need is a bungee cord.
  • When I order bacon, it's usually 2 slices, and it's never crispy-ridiculous.  And in recipes, it's always 3 or 4 slices-what is the point?  I always double the amount required, and same with cheese.
  • Why is there a size zero?  Seriously, that is just silly.
  • If the black box on a plane is indestructible, then why not make the whole plane out of it?  Or how about cars?
  • I saw a concert a few months ago.  I don't go to them very often.  I knew I was getting old when it started to annoy me that there had to be so many encores.  Can we just go from start to finish?  What's with the encores?
  • Why are old people always so early?  Especially to the airport.
  • I like sushi, but I never crave it.  I mean, I have never though to myself, "man, I am starving, what I wouldn't give for some raw fish, wrapped in seaweed and sticky rice".  I am more likely the cheeseburger and fries girl.  I just don't get it.
  • Why are there about 1000 options for toothpaste in the grocery store?