Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Things I have learned

I read this very interesting list of things a columnist named Dave Berry wrote. It was one of those millions of things that gets forwarded over the Internet all the time. I usually only read them when they are short, if I read them at all-and this one met that criteria.

So, here are his 16 items: (I am so weak to use a forwarded spam article I know!)

1) Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2) If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

3) There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4) People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

5)You should not confuse your career with your life.

6) Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

7) Never lick a steak knife

8) The most destructive force in the universe is gossip

9) You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

10) You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggest that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11) There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

12) The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe we are above average drivers.

13) A person who is nice to you, but rude to a waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails)

14) Your friends love you anyway.

15) Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

16) Thought for the day: Men are like fine wine..they start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

Now, I have a hard time believing he came up with all of these himself-as I have heard some of these before. But I do really like these observations. I am not very close to 50, and I have already seen many of these things hold true. The ones I particularly like are in blue. I have few things on my list to-

I read somewhere a long time ago that if you smile a lot-people tend to be more receptive to you. And it is true. I find a simple smile goes a very long way. It actually makes people more attractive when they smile. Regardless of how beautiful you are, a smile will always make you look better and make people more comfortable. I dare you to try this out-spend an entire day smiling at people-strangers, co-workers, your kids, whatever-and I promise you, you will find the world is a much better place.

I have also discovered that being angry and bitter with someone is so much harder than to just get along. It sounds strange, but it takes a lot more energy to complain and be negative. Just being kind is easier and feels much better. I have not always been able to pull it off-but when I do, I am always pleasantly surprised. My grandma used to say "kill'em with kindness". Why do grandmas always have the best expressions? I wonder if I will be one of those grandmas.

I have found that a man's relationship with his mother tells you a great deal about his relationship with his wife. And we really do become our parents despite our denial of it.


  1. Hmmmm. I'm fighting with that whole "angry and bitter" issue myself right now. Are you sure? Really?

    And as the mother of a boy, your last one scares me! :)

  2. Yes, I am sure, and so are you. I though you had an incident not too long ago on your blog where you weren't getting along with someone at work. It was talked about how you are only responsible for you own actions. It was very insightful (though I cannot seem to find it on your blog at the moment).

    Now why would that scare you?

  3. No fair using my own words against me!